Oh how I love Jesus

Thursday was a really busy day, so I didn't get to blog about it until today. In the morning, we went to our Titus play group. There was a very small turnout, about 1/4 of the moms who usually come. Julian was so excited when they brought out the basketballs. It was very laid back.

When I got home I had just enough time to feed Julian, eat my own lunch and then my babysitter Dave came so I could go to my women's bible study. It is really a blessing to have this group, even though the faces are changing a lot. Some who used to come aren't anymore and then there are new people I don't know yet. This is one event I go to every week that is something I do for me. I really need the fellowship time with other women to recharge my batteries during the week. We discussed the Proverbs 31 woman. Many people felt the same that it is really hard not to feel down on yourself when you look at all the qualities of this woman. Strength, dignity, up when it's dark, wisdom, not idle, trustworthy. Bettye who leads the group suggested we pick one quality that we are weak in and begin to focus on that, bringing it to God in reflection and prayer seeing what actions we can start to take. I think one of mine would be to look at "she speaks with wisdom". I confess a struggle with what comes out of my mouth. Harshness of tone, sometimes bad words, critical words, words said out of impatience. These are all things I would like to invite the Lord in to bring change. Please pray that I commit to doing this! I also made a commitment in a past blog to take some time to go through my possessions and see what I can give to bless others. I haven't done that yet.

When I got home I took Julian to McKee Farms again, it was so beautiful outside! He had a little less energy today so he didn't do as much climbing. We spent more time on the swings and just walking around the kids area.

After Julian's nap we went to a Maundy Thursday service at our church. Our pastor shared that maundy actually comes from the Passover dinner that Jesus had with the disciples. He gave a new command, to love one another (John 13:34). Maundy is derived from that command. The service was beautiful. They had candles around the whole front of the church and stage area with really subdued light. The focus was on having communion and taking time to just be with the Lord. I was really touched and moved. Really just overwhelmed with a fresh remembrance of his grace & healing particularly from the long depression and time of despair I had after my son was born. This was a time I wanted to be rejoicing yet I was in the grip of depression and anxiety like nothing I had ever experienced before.(See post from Feb. 20.) My heart tonight was just filled with thanks for the sacrifice Jesus made for us, for me that set me free.

We had dinner at a place called Cafe Porte Alba, an authentic Italian restaurant. It was such a nice time. Our French friends from church invited us and his parents who were visiting from France treated us. Julian got restless at times so I'm glad I had his coloring book with crayons. Then our friend also took him to watch them cook the pizzas which they do right out in the open.

This was certainly a full day.

This morning, we went to the Verona library for our Toddler Time class. This was supposed to be the first day but because of an Easter egg hunt they weren't holding it but hadn't told us. We went to the YMCA instead and I had a great workout where I really pushed myself on the treadmill.

A good part of the afternoon was spent playing with a new set of (used) Hotwheels cars and trucks I found online. We also spent some time playing ball oustide.

The highlight of today was watching the second half of The Passion of the Christ (I went through the first part earlier). I like to watch it every year during holy week. It is so powerful. This movie makes what I read in the bible so real to me. I can't put into words the way it ministers to me seeing this and getting a fresh realization of the cost of my salvation. The agony and suffering and unfathomable love that brought Jesus to the cross. It also makes me think of the depths of my own sin, before I knew him and even now and how incredible it is to have all my sins washed away by his blood. By coming to him, repenting, and being restored. The song "Oh how I love Jesus" just popped into my head. It is so true!

I think I'll end on that note. We're going to visit my family this weekend for Easter which should be a really nice time with my sisters and nieces and nephews.

Back from our weekend away

I have a new look to the blog. I chose a new template on Blogger Design. It was a nice change. I'm back from our weekend away and have a lot to post.

Friday I started a new chapter in my bible study, the Proverbs 31 woman. They made a good point that in reading this, we can look at her as an ideal woman, with characteristics that can be our goal. They cautioned not to use this reading as a way to see if we measure up. That's not the focus. It is so true that this is a lifelong process. Philippians 1:6 is so fitting: being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. It is good to point out that fear of the Lord, which they mention her having, is not being afraid of God like he's sitting up there waiting to punish us for wrong. It means having a reverence, an awe for who God is that we fear displeasing him with our life. This was a good start to the study.

Our weekend away was really nice. There was so much to bring with all the stuff for Julian in addition to what I needed, but one thing I forgot was his eating chair. He ended up doing pretty well sitting in a regular chair pulled up next to the table, even though the table was only chin-level. We left Friday afternoon and were making great time until we hit construction. It was horrible. It added about an hour so we had about 3-1/2 hours in the car. J kept asking to get up, he was getting restless but there was no where to stop in the construction. He didn't sleep either which means he didn't get an afternoon nap. It was good to see Derek and Rhonda and the kids again. Dinner was supposed to be lasagna but it fell onto the floor by accident and was ruined so we ordered pizza. J was rambunctious so we let him stay up late. He was like a Duracell, he kept on going and going. I was surprised that he didn't sleep very well. It must have been the new surroundings. He woke up at least 3 times crying and crying so each time I got up and held him until he calmed down and went back to sleep. We both were really tired the next morning and ended up sleeping in until 9am.

They made breakfast for us and later in the morning we took J outside to enjoy their swing set. They live on 7 acres with beautiful bluffs filled with trees behind the house. Later in the afternoon, we took J in the car and did a 1.5 mile walk. We had a nasty melt down at dinner with J wanting my silverware and not getting that out of his mind. I had to leave the table and go downstairs to calm him down. He was fine after that and then I got to eat my yummy steak dinner. Sunday came way too fast and it was time to head home. We're really glad we made the trip.

J and I did our grocery shopping this morning. There was barely anyone else there, I think I really like waiting until Monday.

I'm getting close to finishing 2Samuel. Today I read 2Samuel 22. This chapter was a celebration of all the victories God has given David over time. It is in psalm format and he sings of the ways God has worked in his life. These are the verses that stood out to me: verse 3 my God is my rock in whom I take refuge. Verse 31: He is a shield for all who take refuge in him. Verse 33: It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. This was a really good chapter to reflect on my own the ways God has given me victory and blessing. Too many to name here!

I continued in my study of Proverbs 31. The woman described here is hard to find. They comment on how rare is a woman of fine character. Her beauty comes not from the outside, but her inner beauty. Her spirit, how she lives. (This reminds me of Esther!) She seeks the Lord's approval, not the world's. She is clothed in strength and dignity. What a powerful combination.

After lunch, J wanted a bowl and a spoon which I gave him. He then gets his Elmo doll and stuffed penguin and starts "feeding" them. Later, he asked to sit on my lap and then he was "feeding" me! How cute. It was a beautiful day again so we went outside and I ended up doing all kinds of garden preparation like weeding and pruning and general clean up. I wasn't sure this would work with J , but he had his bowl and spoon and was making "dirt soup". That kept him busy almost the whole time.

We did our YMCA routine tonight. Again, it was a hard workout. It got easier after I hit 15 minutes and was halfway through. It was good to work out. We started a new eating program today that we got from our friends. It is basically watching the calories you eat, not eating snacks, eating 4 times a day and nothing after 7pm. This is an area I continue to surrender to the Lord. It will be so good (but also hard) to have my husband doing this with me for accountability. But long overdue. I think I'll sign off now so I get to bed at a decent time.