Preparing for "Holy Leisure"

HOLY  +  LEISURE    =     "Holy Leisure"                       

 

Jeremiah 29:11:

"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, 

plans to give you hope and a future."

This verse is a special one for me. It has meant different things at different times, as the Lord has used it to calm and encourage my heart.

He used this verse:
-in a season of singleness which got especially hard after turning 30 and the Lord had not yet shown me if I would find the one to marry (which I did shortly after).
-in my wedding; I put the verse on our wedding invitation as a reminder of His promise as I was entering the covenant of marriage and all that would bring.
-during the darkest time of my life; postpartum psychosis, depression and severe anxiety. The verse was something I held onto when darkness was smothering me and I literally felt hopeless and beyond despair.
-even now as a reminder of His ongoing love which carries me through all the life circumstances I will face.

When I sat down today, I didn't have any idea I'd be writing about that verse. I was thinking about preparing my heart for an upcoming vacation; a time I've scheduled for rest away from the busyness of my life. I'm glad the verse came to my mind, since I do want to prepare my heart. The last several months have been challenging and at times overwhelming. It started when my husband entered a depression that quickly became severe and led to him spending time in the hospital. It was so hard bringing my son there and then we'd have to leave without daddy and my son would just cry saying "Why can't daddy come home?" All I could tell him was that daddy needed special care from the doctors at the hospital. Just before this happened, I had accepted a leadership position in my mom's group at church. Our Titus mom's group has over 100 moms and my training had just started. I had also been asked to be the administrator for a "Lotsa Helping Hands" network for a dear family at our church. (Lotsa Helping Hands is a website where you can schedule caregiving when someone is in need.) For this family, I was responsible for putting things on the calendar (like cleaning, meals, groceries) and maintaining the website for the community of volunteers. My husband was brought through his depression, by God's grace, yet I continued serving in these other areas through this fall. It has only been in the last week I've received some extra help which has been a welcome relief. And if that wasn't enough, last month I was diagnosed with an irregular heart beat, (premature ventricular contraction); basically heart palpitations. Thankfully, the heart beat problem is not symptomatic as it's mainly from stress and not a concern for the doctor other than annoying for me at times. In light of this, I have sensed a deep need to take some time away; especially around this Thanksgiving holiday for reflection, renewal and relaxation.

With all that in mind, my son and I will leave Thursday afternoon for a 10-day vacation down at my sister's home a few hours south of where I live. Staying at her home is like being at a resort with its many rooms, spiral staircase and birds and wild life. I look forward to the simple joy of having no agenda; from enjoying a morning cup of coffee while just watching the birds come to feed, or packing my son in the back pack and heading off for some adventure at the nearby wildlife rehab center. I will have a full week of Otium Sanctum, "holy leisure" leading up to Thanksgiving day when my husband will join us for the holiday weekend. I just read about "holy leisure" in a book called "Celebration of Discipline" by Richard J. Foster. He describes it as a sense of balance in the life, an ability to be at peace through the activities of the day, an ability to rest and take time to enjoy beauty, an ability to pace ourselves.

I'm looking forward to training myself in this way of holy leisure; to rest in Him as I go about each day. I am glad for an extended period of time like this where I can disconnect from projects and commitments and just enjoy some time away. It is truly a blessing to me.

I had all kinds of things I could have written about today; from preschool units of dinosaurs and pumpkins to beautiful fall pictures from a few days we had in the North Woods in September, but right now my computer is actually "in the shop". I'm glad I ended up with no access to the pictures I would have used to put those posts together and instead came up with this one. I'm also glad the Lord is preparing my heart for this getaway; a getaway from worldly things that bog down and a time of drawing nearer to Him, the Source of Life.

Thank you for visiting! I hope to post again soon.

A Little Summer Hiatus

We have been enjoying a little vacation time visiting my extended family down in the Chicago suburbs this past week. Our vacation will continue through the middle of the 4th of July week. I miss posting and look forward to returning to blogging when we are home.

In the meantime, I pray you have a wonderful and safe holiday!

Picture credit: Microsoft Clip Art

Returning Refreshed

We had a really nice Easter vacation spending time with my dad "Boppy" and step mom, "Mimi" (what the kids call them). It was so nice to go back "home" to Illinois, to the suburb of Chicago (Palos Park) where I grew up. It is so peaceful, an area filled with forest preserves and lots and lots of old, old trees. My favorite are the old oak trees scattered throughout.


The days went by fast, but they were well spent. Easter dinner with the extended family was just lovely as my southern step-mom created an authentic Southern Easter dinner and J had a blast playing with all his cousins. I made a couple of my recipes during the week, Tray Baked Chicken and Papa's Goulash which my dad and Debbie (and J) really enjoyed. I was able to catch up with a couple of my good friends from childhood and they got to spend some time with J.


I would have to say that my most favorite part of the trip was my daily walks while J was napping. I was able to leave the house while Boppy and Mimi kept watch. I spent time just drinking in the beauty of the Lord's creation as I explored the familiar area. Taking time to enjoy the sights, sounds and smells drew me closer to God. I took time just gazing in front of the pond that is down the road where a pair of geese have made their home. I loved just listening to the birds and watching the trees sway in the breeze. A couple of my walks were 30 minutes and a couple over 45 minutes. Each walk enabled me to spend quality time in prayer and communion with the Lord out in nature. It was very sweet. It also brought back so many memories of riding my bike up and down the roads and running all over the neighborhood. The houses themselves have changed so much. On each street, several of the old houses have been torn down and immense homes have taken their place. Some look like castles, some look like mountain lodges.




During my walks, it was a treat to see a flock of migrating warblers. They let me come incredibly close and I knew they had to be some type of warbler by their mix of yellow, gray and white colors. After searching the internet, I discovered they were yellow-rumped warblers (first picture). I really enjoyed watching the birds throughout the week, and saw another bird, the white crowned sparrow (second picture), which stopped over at my dad's house. I also enjoyed hearing the birds. The call of the woodpecker, the songs of the robin and the cardinal, the noisy call of the blue jay. My dad's porch was a great place for watching and listening to the birds. It was such a blessing to me.



Another favorite from the week was spending lots of time with J reading books. I didn't have my computer with me and we watched very little TV, so we had lots of time together. I took some time to go through our old kids books in the dank, musty basement and my dad let me take several of them home. They were a wonderful discovery for J, who spent literally hours with me each day, just having me read them to him. He loved this finger play book (picture above) and after having me read it several times, he enjoyed doing the finger play on his own. Frog and Toad are a new favorite.




One of our final treats was making a trip to our little town's ice cream parlor, The Plush Horse, which has been around since 1937. They have a life sized white stuffed horse inside and J was just thrilled to see it. He picked his seat at the cutest little tiny kids table. It was fun taking him to a place his mom used to visit often as a kid. The ice cream is just delicious.

We had plenty of unpacking and settling in to do once we got home, but it's good to be home after having a nice little vacation away.

Wrapping up a Great Vacation

So I am sitting here finally back on the computer after 9 days being unplugged ... I didn't even have a computer here but did hop on my sister's computer once just to sift and sort through our 116 waiting emails.
















I am looking at my belongings packed and waiting by the door, and am a bit wistful; a bit sad to be leaving what has been a little haven this past week. It was such a blessing to spend time away and we only left the house for outings 3 times during the entire week. Once was to take a beautiful hike to the nearby nature center where I put J on my back in this great back pack I'm using more. He and I had such a fun time visiting all the animals; the peregrine falcon, the bald eagle, the bobcat, the red foxes, the owls and then we took some time inside to see a variety of local birds, turtles, snakes and rabbits. The second outing was with Papa Herbie (my sister's 87-year-old father-in-law) who took us to Wild Birds Unlimited to pick up more bird seed for my sister, lunch at McDonald's and then picking up a few things at the grocery store. Our other trip was to my one sister who had us over for dinner and I got caught up on our email.






























It was so great not having to go anywhere but getting up in the morning and spreading the bird seed mix onto the patio areas waiting for the birds to come and making little peanut butter sandwiches to feed to the squirrels. As I let J enjoy a little morning TV show, I enjoyed spending time with the Lord. While I enjoyed my breakfast and coffee I would read the Elisabeth Elliot book These Strange Ashes. She wrote the book Passion and Purity which I enjoyed in my early 20's when I was first truly turning my heart to Jesus. These Strange Ashes is about her first missionary journey which takes place in Santo Domingo where she ministers to the Colorado Indians. I also started a Max Lucado study on the book of Mark that has been encouraging.

Here are the results of where I was spending my extra time......

Books to bring along:
In My Hands, Memories of a Holocaust Rescuer by Irene Gut Opdyke
(DONE; this was a really good book)

The Colony: The Harrowing True Story of the Exiles of Molokai
(Read a bit more of this)

Rabbit Proof Fence by Doris Pilkington
(Read about 1/3 so far. Really good story about aboriginee/white mixed race children forcefully removed from their families and made to live in a special camp. The 3 main characters end up escaping but I'm not at that part yet.)

As We Forgive by Catherine Claire Larson
(I didn't end up reading any more of this)

The Shack by William Paul Young
(This book is too tough a subject. I read up to the point where the parent's little girl is kidnapped and I know she gets murdered but I just can't read on.)

Washed by Blood by Brian "Head" Welch
(Didn't get to this one)

Books for spiritual enrichment:
Crazy Love by Francis Chan
(Didn't get to this)
The Gospel of Mark study by Max Lucado
(Liking this study a lot)
These Strange Ashes by Elisabeth Elliot
(Really enjoying reading this)
Creative Correction by Lisa Whelchel
(Didn't get to this)

Other:
The Everything Guide to Potty Training by Kim Bookout, DNP, RN, CPNP
(Didn't get to this)

Movies:
Living Proof
This one had a lot of hoky-ness to it with some really cheesy scenes, but I was most interested in the story about how Herceptin (a strong breast cancer fighting drug) came to be put on the market. My mom went through breast cancer and succumbed to it during the time this drug was going through the incredibly challenging process of getting approved.
Penelope
I really liked this movie, even though the idea of it is a bit goofy (a fairy tale about a curse that causes a girl to be born with a pig nose and she needs to find someone to accept her and marry her to break the curse). I picked this one up when I saw James McAvoy was in it. I have seen a few of his movies now and really like his acting. This was a great story.
The Pianist
Didn't get to this one.
John & Abigail Adams
L and I are going to watch this one tomorrow night.

For the last part of this vacation, L joined me today for our year-in-review. This morning, we dropped J off at my sister's house where immediately he ran off to play with his 3-year-old cousin Henry. Before this, I had a really hard time getting him out of the house as he didn't want to leave and was talking about really missing me, but once he was there all that disappeared and he was having fun. I was a little worried since this is big for us to be apart from him on an overnight. So much fun that they didn't even need to call me to put him on the phone to help him go to sleep. We did a little facebook chatting in the afternoon and my heart was content knowing he was having a good time. So L and I were able to spend some real quality time together, reviewing the things the Lord had been doing in our life the past year. This part takes a good amount of time; we really wished we had another day but we need to pick up J in the morning. We are getting up early to begin prayerfully sharing what the Lord was teaching us and then to move on to talking about the things we envision for the coming year. This will be an ongoing conversation that we'll take into our morning times together.

So .... I am officially back. I definitely feel refreshed and have some clarity for what would be a good way of sustaining this refreshment once we're home. Like, spending less time on things that are wasteful especially needless computer time. I want to make the time the Lord has given me count.

Vacation Down Time (A Blogging Intermission)

This is a picture of my sister's living room, a place where I'll be hanging out a lot in the coming week. I got an unexpected invitation when my sister called letting me know they are going to be out of town for the next week. She had this great idea that we come down on a mini-vacation and spend time at their place, a few hours away, while they're gone. After a little finagling, I am now starting to pack and prepare for a wonderful low-key vacation. We will all drive down together this weekend with my husband staying overnight, then he'll head back home for the work week and J and I will stay on at my sister's. The great thing is that my other two sisters and their kids live close by so we'll be able to get together during the week.

L will come back to join us the following weekend and we'll have some couple-only time. We've arranged for J to stay over with a sister so we can do our year-in-review. We haven't taken a time of annual reflection together since before J was born. Before that, we would enjoy a New Year get-away to have time to go through our journals and reflect on what the Lord was at work at in our lives that year. Then we would write down what things were working well, what the Lord may want to change and finally we would pray for the coming year together. I'm so excited that we'll be restarting this tradition in our life.

A Bit Unplugged
I'll be taking a break from Facebook, blogging and will only allow myself computer time to check my email. I am preparing to do a lot of reading with the extra time, fun time with J while also getting some time with my sisters too. Since I'm a list maker, I put together a list of books and movies I'm bringing along. I have already dabbled with reading 5 of the books as I'm a nut who loves to have several books going at once. It'll be fun to see which ones will grab my attention during this down time.


Books to bring along:
(Finish) In My Hands, Memories of a Holocaust Rescuer by Irene Gut Opdyke
(Continue) The Colony: The Harrowing True Story of the Exiles of Molokai
Rabbit Proof Fence by Doris Pilkington
(Finish) As We Forgive by Catherine Claire Larson
The Shack by William Paul Young
Washed by Blood by Brian "Head" Welch

Books for spiritual enrichment:
Crazy Love by Francis Chan
The Gospel of Mark study by Max Lucado
These Strange Ashes by Elisabeth Elliot
Creative Correction by Lisa Whelchel

Other:
The Everything Guide to Potty Training by Kim Bookout, DNP, RN, CPNP

Movies:
Living Proof
Penelope
The Pianist
John & Abigail Adams

So I'll be signing off for now .... and hope to return ready to share during the week of January 17th. I'll miss this place!

We are leaving today for the North Woods of Wisconsin going on vacation. We'll be spending several days in a cozy 2-bedroom cabin on a lake surrounded by pine trees and from what I hear lots of deer and other wildlife (like bald eagles). There may be a post or two if we can get WiFi, but otherwise will be having a little down time.

Tot School (Vacation Time)

(J is 26 months old)

This past week, we were on vacation at my sister's house in the suburbs of Chicago. We didn't do official Tot School, but we did a lot of different activities and took pictures. He also seemed to do a lot of coloring, but I didn't get any pictures of that. J really enjoyed his time playing with his cousins, ages 6 and 8. They had a lot of fun.



J is all ready for his first swim in my sister Amy's pool. He had a session of lessons at the YMCA and we've gone swimming a few times on our own at the Y and at a lake. He gained a lot of confidence this week in the pool. He went from holding me tightly to floating in the water on his tummy and just holding my hands as we moved around.
















I would say one of the highlights of J's week was playing with his cousin Blake's dinosaurs. We didn't have any of these at our house (until now after some generous donations from Blake) and he just loved setting them up and playing with them.
















The family joined in with one of J's passions, reading. He had the privilege of having books read by his Aunt Laurie, his Uncle Rick and his Aunt Amy. He was animated too, talking and pointing to pictures while they read.

For more Tot School ideas, see 1+1=1.

Another lovely day of vacation

Our vacation adventure continues. It's actually very laid back and relaxing. J is sleeping past 8am most mornings, we're spending a lot of our time just hanging out around Amy's house. Today we did some puzzles together after breakfast. One with my niece and nephew, and then J and I did a few that were for his age. He really liked these. J has gotten really good at entertaining his cousins. He's realized he can make them laugh by just making faces or saying words they ask him to say. We took a walk in J's car and his cousins each got to push the car one way. They were pretty excited about that.


Before afternoon nap, we spent some time swimming. J did great in the water wings today thanks to cousin Blake. He got them out and J actually wanted them today. It was amazing how relaxed he got in the water. He went from clinging to me to just holding my hands and stretching out floating on his tummy while kicking his legs. We'd do little bits of this, then I'd hold him close and tell him how good he was doing and then we'd do some more.


Dinner was great, having steak quesedillas on the grill. After dinner, we all went in the hot tub. This was J's first time. He really enjoyed it, especially after he found out he could stand on one side of it. Then he really got comfortable and was splashing and walking from me to the railing and back. The kids went into the pool and then J wanted to go. We went back and forth a couple times and all of a sudden it was really dark and time for bed. It was another good day.

In my times with the Lord this week, I've been reading Acts 10 and 11. We see Paul preaching to the Gentiles as Peter is preaching to the Jews. Two giants of the faith, Beth says, although they had different callings. Paul came to see that God accepts men from all nations who fear him and do what is right (Acts 10:34-35). Later, while Peter was on a rooftop to pray, he had a vision from God. In this vision, God was admonishing him to not consider anything impure that God had made clean. He comes to learn the meaning of this is the barrier between the Gentiles and the Jews. God sends the men of Cornelius (a centurion) to ask Peter to come see him. Peter accepts this invitation in obedience, even though meeting and certainly eating with Gentiles was forbidden for Jews. God through his word was breaking down prejudicial barriers through his followers who obeyed. Beth reflects a lot about this. It was good to think about where in my life do I have prejudices, especially spiritually. So often we can have spiritual pride where we feel superior to others and do not see our blind spot. This has happened to me and when the Lord has opened my eyes to it, it is very humbling. Later in Acts 11, Barnabas and Saul went to preach and be with the church in Antioch. When Barnabas saw the evidence of the grace of God there, he encouraged them to remain true to the Lord with all their hearts. Here Saul was teaching the principles of a godly life while Barnabas was encouraging them to stay faithful. Having a Barnabas in the body you are connected to is so powerful. It is also powerful when you get the chance to be a Barnabas to others. You never know when something you say will have an impact for good in a person's life.

Enjoyed a play date with friends

The morning went by so quickly today. Getting the kids breakfast, cleaning up, getting J dressed then saying goodbye to my niece and nephew, starting my own breakfast and our friends for a play date showed up. My sister Amy and I grew up with sisters Jen and Sam and the four of us had sleep overs all the time. It was really great to hang out again. This was a good opportunity for J to work more on sharing and keeping his hands to himself. He played with our friend Jen's 2-year-old so he got lots of practice. It never fails that they want the toy the other one has. It was raining on and off all day so we didn't get to swim. After lunch, J took a good nap and I got to talk with daddy. He's been able to catch up with a few different people and is enjoying some time off work today through Friday. I'm glad he's getting some down time. Today my sister Laurie was discharged from the hospital with an all clear. No problems found so that's great news. It was my other sister Amy's birthday today.




We celebrated by going out to dinner. J had a little meltdown but I was able to head it off with his spiderman coloring book. He had a couple dinosaurs and after dinner he was playing with them and talking about spaghetti. I had one of the dinosaurs and said "we want spaghetti" and he then bounced the dinosaurs up and down saying "we want spaghetti", and "we want brown muffins" (which is what he calls chocolate muffins). You had to be there, but it was just so cute we were all laughing. Then in the car he was singing "twinkle twinkle" and I joined him. He's just starting to sing songs and it is so neat as I love to sing around the house a lot and now he's starting to join me.

Needs versus wants, good to ponder

Ahhh...the joy of sleeping in! J and I are sleeping in the same room and he didn't wake up until 9:30 this morning. This was good since the alarm kept going off and I couldn't figure out how to stop it so I kept getting woken up. (Next time I'll just unplug it but I was just too tired to think about that.)

We got a scare today with news that my older sister Laurie went into the hospital at 3 in the morning after not feeling right. I took some time to pray since this was unnerving and then also prayed with J and just as I was finishing he joined me in saying "amen". Laurie's kids were dropped off in the afternoon and my sister Amy was gone so I was in charge of the 5 kids. To do something other than watch TV, I had the idea to pick a picture out of a coloring book and color one for Aunt Laurie. Everyone was really serious about it, even J. I really hope it's a blessing to her. Thank the Lord we found out everything was alright, but they wanted to keep her overnight for observation. The two boys took a nap and the rest of us went for a swim once Amy got home.

I was able to catch some quiet time and was going to read my book To Live is Christ but then I found some notes I took from a speaker who came to my MOPS group in early spring. I really enjoyed going through the notes and taking time to look up the scriptures and think. Her focus was on looking at the scriptures and as we read asking ourselves, "What does this tell us about the Lord?" and "What does this tell us about how to live?" Especially, what is our attitude toward possessions. She shared the importance of this for ourselves, but passing it along to our children as well. A main point was truly focusing on what we NEED, not just getting more things. Also surrendering our impulse to buy everything we WANT but to pare that down and say "can I really do without this?" If so, I don't really need to buy it. This was really helpful to me since I've been ordering a lot of things from the internet lately at random and not giving much thought to much purchases. It's definitely coming from more of an "I want" versus having truly thought it over and asking if I really need it or having prayed about it.

The verses today were: my
Matthew 6:33 Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well.
John 18:36 Jesus said, "My kingdom is not of this world. If it were, my servants would fight to prevent my arrest by the Jews. But now my kingdom is from another place.
Matthew 3:2 Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near.

Fun pics from last Saturday's BBQ (at my sister's)

Vacation is off to a good start

On Saturday, we drove down to my sister's place in Downer's Grove for a BBQ and kick-off to vacation. J did so well being with so many different family members (sisters, step mom, cousins) who wanted some J time. His favorite thing was playing with these dinosaur figures of his cousin's. He also loved following around his 3-year-old cousin Henry all over the place. "Henry come play" he'd say. The best was when Henry, J and a friend's 2-year-old Zach went inside a see-through tent and were running around and around chasing and romping with each other. It was a long day though and we knew it was time to go around 9:30 when J was a little loopy from being overtired. He slept a little in the car but otherwise hadn't napped and he was wiped. We stayed the night at my older sister's place along with my sister Laurie (so 3 out of the 4 sisters were together). My cousin from St. Louis who had come up also stayed the night.

Sunday Aunt Kelly and Uncle RoRo made an incredible brunch for 12 with fruit salad, scrambled eggs, bacon, pancakes with homemade blueberry compote and breakfast casserole. Wow! It was like being at a B&B. J had some OJ before eating and I didn't realize how much he drank until he would barely touch his food. He filled up on OJ! Soon he and Henry were off running around outside again. We stayed most of the day just relaxing but mostly indoors since it was so hot and humid outside. Once at my sister Ame's we unloaded and unpacked all the things for J and I for the week and put him down for a nap. Not 1/2 hour later he's crying and calling for me and I go in there and he says "I feel good mommy" meaning he was done with nap. So we got changed into swimsuits and went swimming. J was so excited to use the Batman water wings and then saw me with goggles and says "Where's J's goggles?" So we got him a pair. He looked absolutely adorable! Once in the water, though, he hated how the water wings felt so we took them off. He was great in the water as long as he could hold on tight to me. After dinner and then putting the kids to bed, Ame and I spent some time relaxing in the hot tub! It was very hot at first but then very relaxing. I then took a swim in the pool to cool off. It was great swimming underneath the stars. After another dip in the hot tub it was time to call it a night. Before bed, I was on Facebook and L instant messaged me and we chatted catching up on the rest of the day.

This morning I was up before everyone else and was able to have some devotional time. I was reading Acts 9:11-43. "From preacher to teacher." Once the disciple Ananias comes to Saul and speaks with him he regains his sight. Then at once he began to preach. The disciples didn't believe Saul was truly converted and were afraid of him. Saul spoke boldly in the name of the Lord. The irony is amazing, Beth reflects (in To Live is Christ), that Saul had come to Damascus to take prisoners but then he ended up being let into their homes. Verse 22 "Saul grew more and more powerful." Then the Jews tried to kill him. Barnabas, another disciple, opened his heart to Saul trusting him and his conversion story and then brought him in with the disciples. Saul's conversion story is just incredible to me. That he actually hears Jesus' voice, the men with him are petrified, he falls to his knees and is blinded! Then the Lord opens his eyes (truly) and he comes to believe. It is powerful for me to see Saul's passion to preach and to share the good news. Sometimes I find this so hard to do. I always pray for openings to share for Christ, yet sometimes I hold back and end up missing an opportunity. I look forward to reading more of this book as Paul is such an inspiration yet it also brings forth a challenge.


The kids played together after breakfast and then J lies down on the hardwood floor and says "I'm tired." I pick him up and bring him to the room to nap and he says "No, I feel good" but just looked so tired so I put him down and he ended up taking a 2 hour nap. His only nap of the day. After lunch, cousin Haley took J out to play in the sandbox.


We swam in the afternoon and my sister also held J for a while so I could swim around a bit. He didn't put up with that very long though because everything is still "no, mommy do it". Even brushing his teeth tonight. His cousin Haley asked to brush his teeth which I thought a great idea but J kept saying for me to do it. I did a little then he was OK with Haley taking over. Ame read the kids a couple books then they went off to bed.

We're camping in Devil's Lake Saturday to Sunday so I'm off a few days.

Our family is on a weekend retreat at Whispering Ridge in Oxford, WI. I hope to be back online Monday or Tuesday.

Have a great weekend!!

Back from our weekend away

I have a new look to the blog. I chose a new template on Blogger Design. It was a nice change. I'm back from our weekend away and have a lot to post.

Friday I started a new chapter in my bible study, the Proverbs 31 woman. They made a good point that in reading this, we can look at her as an ideal woman, with characteristics that can be our goal. They cautioned not to use this reading as a way to see if we measure up. That's not the focus. It is so true that this is a lifelong process. Philippians 1:6 is so fitting: being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. It is good to point out that fear of the Lord, which they mention her having, is not being afraid of God like he's sitting up there waiting to punish us for wrong. It means having a reverence, an awe for who God is that we fear displeasing him with our life. This was a good start to the study.

Our weekend away was really nice. There was so much to bring with all the stuff for Julian in addition to what I needed, but one thing I forgot was his eating chair. He ended up doing pretty well sitting in a regular chair pulled up next to the table, even though the table was only chin-level. We left Friday afternoon and were making great time until we hit construction. It was horrible. It added about an hour so we had about 3-1/2 hours in the car. J kept asking to get up, he was getting restless but there was no where to stop in the construction. He didn't sleep either which means he didn't get an afternoon nap. It was good to see Derek and Rhonda and the kids again. Dinner was supposed to be lasagna but it fell onto the floor by accident and was ruined so we ordered pizza. J was rambunctious so we let him stay up late. He was like a Duracell, he kept on going and going. I was surprised that he didn't sleep very well. It must have been the new surroundings. He woke up at least 3 times crying and crying so each time I got up and held him until he calmed down and went back to sleep. We both were really tired the next morning and ended up sleeping in until 9am.

They made breakfast for us and later in the morning we took J outside to enjoy their swing set. They live on 7 acres with beautiful bluffs filled with trees behind the house. Later in the afternoon, we took J in the car and did a 1.5 mile walk. We had a nasty melt down at dinner with J wanting my silverware and not getting that out of his mind. I had to leave the table and go downstairs to calm him down. He was fine after that and then I got to eat my yummy steak dinner. Sunday came way too fast and it was time to head home. We're really glad we made the trip.

J and I did our grocery shopping this morning. There was barely anyone else there, I think I really like waiting until Monday.

I'm getting close to finishing 2Samuel. Today I read 2Samuel 22. This chapter was a celebration of all the victories God has given David over time. It is in psalm format and he sings of the ways God has worked in his life. These are the verses that stood out to me: verse 3 my God is my rock in whom I take refuge. Verse 31: He is a shield for all who take refuge in him. Verse 33: It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. This was a really good chapter to reflect on my own the ways God has given me victory and blessing. Too many to name here!

I continued in my study of Proverbs 31. The woman described here is hard to find. They comment on how rare is a woman of fine character. Her beauty comes not from the outside, but her inner beauty. Her spirit, how she lives. (This reminds me of Esther!) She seeks the Lord's approval, not the world's. She is clothed in strength and dignity. What a powerful combination.

After lunch, J wanted a bowl and a spoon which I gave him. He then gets his Elmo doll and stuffed penguin and starts "feeding" them. Later, he asked to sit on my lap and then he was "feeding" me! How cute. It was a beautiful day again so we went outside and I ended up doing all kinds of garden preparation like weeding and pruning and general clean up. I wasn't sure this would work with J , but he had his bowl and spoon and was making "dirt soup". That kept him busy almost the whole time.

We did our YMCA routine tonight. Again, it was a hard workout. It got easier after I hit 15 minutes and was halfway through. It was good to work out. We started a new eating program today that we got from our friends. It is basically watching the calories you eat, not eating snacks, eating 4 times a day and nothing after 7pm. This is an area I continue to surrender to the Lord. It will be so good (but also hard) to have my husband doing this with me for accountability. But long overdue. I think I'll sign off now so I get to bed at a decent time.