Saturday, March 13, 2010

Visited Grampa today

After pancakes for breakfast, Julian wanted to color for a bit. Then I went downstairs to check on Rio. This morning she seems worse. Instead of laying on the bed she was sitting on the floor and her breathing sounds wheezy like her nose is stuffed. I got her IV equipment and Julian was upset with me being downstairs so I thought I'd keep him busy with my watering can he was reaching for. He was pretend watering but couldn't reach the plants so I took him around to the plants and helped him "water" them. Then I went downstairs and gave Rio her IV. She was real squirmy. Part of me feels like maybe my next step should have been putting her down instead of extending her life with the IV. That's what my husband is thinking. The vet thinks the wheezing could be a sign that her heart is too weak to pump the extra fluid so it's gathering in her lungs. I have to make a decision soon.

We spent some time at the library this morning and I checked out Dot the Fire Dog (one of his favorites) along with Elmo goes to the Firehouse. I also got a book called Who's Been Here which is a story about discovering which animals made which tracks. It was really dreary outside, very windy with light rain which pelted your face.

Today I read and studied the first half of 2Samuel. Beth shares how this is a very painful chapter to read where David is confronted by Nathan (a prophet). The Lord sent Nathan to David. He tells a story which alludes to David's behavior and shares words from the Lord which were basically, "I anointed you, delivered you and gave you Saul's kingdom, why did you despise the word of the Lord?". He wounded the heart of the Lord. Then David admits his sin to Nathan who tells him that David is not going to die but the Lord will bring calamity out of his house and his child will die. David fasted and prayed but his son still died. After the death, he went out and worshiped the Lord. His heart is turning back to God. He comforted Bathsheba who later gave birth to another son, Solomon, whom it says the Lord loved. Beth reflects on this sharing what happens when we don't confess our sin right away. It ends up festering inside us and effects us not only emotionally but can have a physical effect. She calls it sin sickness. It also puts a wedge between us and God until we confess it to him and seek forgiveness. She refers to Psalm 32:3 When I kept silent my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long.

We spent the afternoon up at the hospital visiting my father-in-law. We have been estranged from him and my stepmother-in-law for over a year. It's a very, very long story. It's related to my long-term depression and major differences we had. We are working on reconciliation and I think this was a good step in that direction. My husband's dad had part of his lung removed because of a tumor in it. They think they got it all but won't know for sure until after a few days of reviewing test results. I think it really made a difference for his dad to see Julian and for Julian to see his Grampa.

The big excitement for this Saturday evening was going to get groceries. My husband was invited to a friend's home where some of the men from his men's group at church were hanging out. So Julian and I got the shopping done while daddy was gone. I love how our grocery store will have neat things for Julian at a great price. It's where I got him his first sled and then today I got him a large plastic golf club with a large plastic golf ball. I was showing him how to play and we had a couple different games going. In the first game, Julian would throw the ball to me and say "hit it" and I'd hit the ball and he'd go running for it. Then we played a game like tag where I'd try to get the ball to him and he'd try to dodge it. Later I saw him practicing hitting the ball with the club. He's getting the hang of it. I get some alone-time and can relax and curl up with a book.

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